Day 14:

A 40-day test to see what happens when I stop waiting for the plot twist… and become it.

People always say, “Just find joy in the little things.”
And I’ve always wondered if maybe those people haven’t lived through the hard stuff…
Or maybe they found some secret “unlock the joy” button.

Because for most of my life, joy wasn’t a decision.
It wasn’t a mindset.
It was a ghost I couldn’t catch.

But this morning?
I woke up… proud.

I stepped on the scale and saw I was down six pounds.
I’ve been trying since March.
Let’s just say — it hasn’t been the easiest journey with my weight.
Not exactly the kind of “drop it fast” story you see in magazine headlines. More like: trial, error, supplements, setbacks, and the occasional stubborn bloat that feels personally offensive.

So yeah, seeing even one tiny piece of progress in even one area I’ve been clawing my way through for months?
Cherry. On. Top.
(The metaphorical sundae is still melting all over the counter, but hey — I’ll take the cherry.)

But the thing that actually cracked me open —
Wasn’t the scale.

It was the stack of four blog posts I wrote yesterday.
Yes, four. In one day.
Which sounds a little unhinged, but when the words came, they really came.

I rediscovered something I forgot I loved: writing.
Not the kind you crank out for an algorithm.
Not the kind you edit to death so strangers won’t scroll away.
The kind where your fingers can barely keep up with what your brain is spilling.

Because even if no one reads the blog,
I know people are watching the reels.
I know women are listening.
And for the first time in forever, the feedback I’m getting isn’t just likes or clicks —
It’s impact.
Little messages. Quiet comments. Women saying, “this hit me.”
That’s a different kind of fuel.

And one of those posts?
It’s going to become a full series.
When I finished writing it, I cried.

Not because I was proud — but because I felt grateful.
Grateful that maybe this work… this tiny corner of the internet…
might help a woman who’s lost her confidence
find her way back.

That’s what gave me confidence.
That’s what unlocked joy.

Josh and I decided we needed some connecting time,
and I had an idea:
we should race to see who could get ready first.

He agreed.
We said go…
And I played dirty. Locked him out of the room.
(Highly recommend. 10/10. Marriage counseling not required.)

It was the most fun we’ve had together in ages.
Sometimes joy doesn’t look like champagne or a weekend getaway —
Sometimes it looks like me cackling while he bangs on the door because I stole the lead.

Then we went to IKEA.
Just walked.
Bought nothing.
Had lunch in the café like old people on a budget date.
You know, meatballs and bottomless lingonberry soda — peak romance.
And somehow, that felt like investing in our marriage more than a fancy night out ever could.

On the drive home, he asked,
“How do people keep finding joy, once they’ve already seen so much?”

I didn’t answer right away.
Instead… I read him the blog post I’d written yesterday.
Because that was my answer.

I’m not chasing joy anymore.
I’m choosing confidence.
Choosing to show up.
Choosing to trust the compound effect of tiny wins and ordinary days.

And today?
That choice brought joy with it.